Note to Self 30:
Hang in there, it's almost over:
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Diary of a BB 3:
Dear Diary:
I have come to the conclusion that my mommy hates me!
SHE HATES ME.
Why else would she be SO MEAN??? It's really the only explanation.
I mean, why can't I have another pet? I just want a pet that likes me. These stupid cats always run away from me!!! WHY??? I am so nice to them. I just want to pet them and put bows on their ears and put them in my dolls' clothes! Why don't they want to look nice? You would think they would appreciate me!
She keeps making me read stuff too! SCHOOL IS OVER MOMMA! Don't you get it is MY SUMMER VACATION???
It's NO FAIR!!!!!!
AND she keeps signing us up for CAMP! I don't want to go to camp. I HATE CAMP. It's too hot, and I want to sit around and play my DSi and eat ice cream sandwhiches.
She should send my brother to camp and let me stay home! He's so annoying.
AND she keeps brushing my hair! She hurts me on purpose. I swear SHE LIKES IT. And she keeps threatening me that if I don't let her brush it she is going to cut it all off. SHE IS SO MEAN.
AND she wouldn't let me take out a movie at the library today. So what if I have 6 out already?? Supposedly the library only lets you take out 6, but COME ON! You can take out a zillion books at a time so why not a zillion movies???? That's a stupid STUPID RULE!
This just proves that everyone hates me! Even the library is out to get me.
WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
IT'S NO FAIR!
I have come to the conclusion that my mommy hates me!
SHE HATES ME.
Why else would she be SO MEAN??? It's really the only explanation.
I mean, why can't I have another pet? I just want a pet that likes me. These stupid cats always run away from me!!! WHY??? I am so nice to them. I just want to pet them and put bows on their ears and put them in my dolls' clothes! Why don't they want to look nice? You would think they would appreciate me!
She keeps making me read stuff too! SCHOOL IS OVER MOMMA! Don't you get it is MY SUMMER VACATION???
It's NO FAIR!!!!!!
AND she keeps signing us up for CAMP! I don't want to go to camp. I HATE CAMP. It's too hot, and I want to sit around and play my DSi and eat ice cream sandwhiches.
She should send my brother to camp and let me stay home! He's so annoying.
AND she keeps brushing my hair! She hurts me on purpose. I swear SHE LIKES IT. And she keeps threatening me that if I don't let her brush it she is going to cut it all off. SHE IS SO MEAN.
AND she wouldn't let me take out a movie at the library today. So what if I have 6 out already?? Supposedly the library only lets you take out 6, but COME ON! You can take out a zillion books at a time so why not a zillion movies???? That's a stupid STUPID RULE!
This just proves that everyone hates me! Even the library is out to get me.
WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
IT'S NO FAIR!
Friday, August 5, 2011
Dear Weird Old Guy:
Dear Weird Old Guy:
What are you trying to accomplish by rollerblading down the street with ski poles?
Just curious.
Love,
ME
What are you trying to accomplish by rollerblading down the street with ski poles?
Just curious.
Love,
ME
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Note to Self 29
Note to Self 29:
YOU are OFFICIALLY down to 0 house phones. Where they have all disappeared to is anyone's guess.
Take a breather before you go buy a new one. You know they will all turn up after you fucking spend the money that YOU DON'T HAVE* on a new one.
*Because no one sends you your fucking paycheck on time.
YOU are OFFICIALLY down to 0 house phones. Where they have all disappeared to is anyone's guess.
Take a breather before you go buy a new one. You know they will all turn up after you fucking spend the money that YOU DON'T HAVE* on a new one.
*Because no one sends you your fucking paycheck on time.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Dear Asswipe:
Dear Asswipe:
WHAT THE FUCK. Can you please send me my paycheck?????
I am UNABLE to pay my fucking bills because YOU can't pay yours. GIVE ME MY MONEY.
Is it fair that I have to field phone calls from the stupid car loan people because you can't send me MY money on time????? I should fucking forward all calls to you!
Meanwhile, NICE LIES YOU TELL when I call about it and you act like it is in the mail. If it is in the mail, I would have gotten it 3 days ago. It's not like you are fucking mailing the shit to me from fucking Guam. You are 20 minutes away from me.
Dipshit.
Love,
ME
WHAT THE FUCK. Can you please send me my paycheck?????
I am UNABLE to pay my fucking bills because YOU can't pay yours. GIVE ME MY MONEY.
Is it fair that I have to field phone calls from the stupid car loan people because you can't send me MY money on time????? I should fucking forward all calls to you!
Meanwhile, NICE LIES YOU TELL when I call about it and you act like it is in the mail. If it is in the mail, I would have gotten it 3 days ago. It's not like you are fucking mailing the shit to me from fucking Guam. You are 20 minutes away from me.
Dipshit.
Love,
ME
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Dear Egocentric Idiot:
Dear Egocentric Idiot:
God it is super hard to deal with you.
Guess what, NOT EVERYTHING has to do with you. Get a fucking life and go read some self help books that will teach you about self esteem.
I don't know if you are aware, but the world DOES NOT revolve around you. If I am upset about something, it really has NOTHING to do with you (MOST of the time). Stop turning everything around so it is about YOU and then crying about it.
GET OVER IT!
If you are unhappy with yourself, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Stop running around and crying that no one likes you!
It's actually pretty wierdo that you can have such a low opinion about yourself yet still think that everyone on earth is spending all their time thinking about you, talking about you, and hating your guts. I hate to break it to you, but YOU ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT.
Jackass.
Love,
ME
God it is super hard to deal with you.
Guess what, NOT EVERYTHING has to do with you. Get a fucking life and go read some self help books that will teach you about self esteem.
I don't know if you are aware, but the world DOES NOT revolve around you. If I am upset about something, it really has NOTHING to do with you (MOST of the time). Stop turning everything around so it is about YOU and then crying about it.
GET OVER IT!
If you are unhappy with yourself, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Stop running around and crying that no one likes you!
It's actually pretty wierdo that you can have such a low opinion about yourself yet still think that everyone on earth is spending all their time thinking about you, talking about you, and hating your guts. I hate to break it to you, but YOU ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT.
Jackass.
Love,
ME
Monday, August 1, 2011
Dear Money Hungry Assholes:
Dear Money Hungry Assholes:
I love how you make all these stupid filters for vaccuums, humidifiers, etc., and then you can't buy the fucking filters for them ANYWHERE.
FUCK YOU.
Assholes.
Then you stop making the filters and end up having to buy a new fucking vaccuum or whatever it is. It reminds me of the time that my perfectly functioning camera's battery door fell off and I couldn't keep the batteries in. I couldn't get it fixed!!!! The thing worked perfectly and I ended up having to buy a new camera because of it.
Quite the little racket you've got going here.
Dicks.
Love,
ME
I love how you make all these stupid filters for vaccuums, humidifiers, etc., and then you can't buy the fucking filters for them ANYWHERE.
FUCK YOU.
Assholes.
Then you stop making the filters and end up having to buy a new fucking vaccuum or whatever it is. It reminds me of the time that my perfectly functioning camera's battery door fell off and I couldn't keep the batteries in. I couldn't get it fixed!!!! The thing worked perfectly and I ended up having to buy a new camera because of it.
Quite the little racket you've got going here.
Dicks.
Love,
ME
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