Dear MS:

Dear MS:

I'm so glad you learned how to dial 911 in case of an emergency! Just so we are clear, an emergency IS NOT:

-that you need a bandaid.
-that I'm not paying enough attention to you.
-that you want fruit loops.

An emergency would be me trying to drown you in the tub or clubbing your father over the head with a frying pan repeatedly until he is unconcious (because he implied that I am not watching you close enough. However, when you are lying in your bed watching Star Wars, how am I supposed to know that you have gotten a phone and dialed 911?).

In the future, please stay away from the phone. Period.

Thanks!

Love,
Mommy