Dear Middle Spawn:
Once again let me thank you for soiling yourself at the most inopportune of moments. While sitting in the park watching your sister's soccer practice, with a screaming baby in the car, YOU, who can whip it out anywhere and go, chose to pee your pants.
How wonderful we had to be at swimming lessons immediately following soccer.
Even more wonderful was the fact that I had no clothes for you.
Sorry to humiliate you by dressing you in a pair of your sister's long johns that she happened to have in her soccer bag. Maybe cross dressing will scare you into peeing somewhere OTHER than your pants.
In the meantime, in Belgium there is a statue of a boy who supposedly saved Brussels by peeing on it when it was on fire. Keep in mind, this boy is a hero because he peed NOT IN HIS PANTS*.
Love you,
Mommy
*Check it out: http://www.traveleurope360.com/catch-the-amusing-statue-of-the-pissing-boy-manneken-pis.html By the way, I LOVE Belgium.
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