Sunday, May 15, 2011

Dear Fashion People:

Dear Fashion People:

Why is it so difficult to find an evening gown? It seems to me the only people who YOU think are in the market for formal evening wear are teenage girls going to prom. I am here to tell you that is FALSE.

Every time I have to find a gown for a formal affair, I run into this problem. 

Women who have had children, or even women who are over 30, cannot be walking around in these backless, sleeveless, crotchless dresses you call fashion.

WHERE are the evening gowns for adult females? What is your problem? WHY can't you find fucking dresses in a department store anymore? For your information, grown women, and anyone weighing more than 90 lbs cannot shop in the Juniors department, which is where any and all evening gowns can be found.

Please rectify this situation, as I will be attending a formal wedding in June, and do not want to show up in a fucking sun dress and flip flops.

Thanks.
Love,
ME
Posted by Jessjh at 7:38 AM

7 comments:

  1. ihateeverythingMay 15, 2011 at 10:31 PM

    bastards!

    it's true! any formal dress either has some form of cheap tulle and/or glittery blue zebra print fabric. ALL WRONG.

    ReplyDelete
  2. JessjhMay 16, 2011 at 8:09 AM

    AND, unless you go to a dress shop YOU WILL NOT FIND A GOWN. So annoying. They used to have them in department stores. WTF???

    ReplyDelete
  3. no this not a joke, it's my lifeMay 16, 2011 at 9:22 AM

    I went online ideeli.com, it's a daily fashion sale. I haven't tried it on. fingers x'd lets hope for the best ! you will look hot, jess you weigh like a 100lbs after 3 babies !

    ReplyDelete
  4. MaryMay 16, 2011 at 10:33 AM

    I tried on a few junior dresses. They not only had bows in places I didn't want, when I was trying them on they said "Fuck you. I'm going to make you feel like absolute shit about yourself." And they succeeded.

    www.justinappropriate.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. JessjhMay 16, 2011 at 11:10 AM

    While it is true I can fit into almost anything,that doesn't mean I should! It's true they make you feel like shit, because we are becoming old hags and it is no longer advisable to dress like a 16 year old. Or even a 25 year old. Sigh. Fucking sad is what it is.

    ReplyDelete
  6. AlyssaMay 16, 2011 at 5:37 PM

    http://satinsilkandsun.blogspot.com/2011/05/makes-me-smile-award.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+SatinSilkAndSun+%28Satin%2C+Silk+and+Sun%29
    I love your blog so much, the 'Makes Me Smile Award'

    ReplyDelete
  7. JessjhMay 17, 2011 at 8:24 AM

    Thanks! That's so sweet!

    ReplyDelete

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